I have a frisky sex life.
- Me: you're such a good cuddler.
- Pillow:
- Pillow:
- Pillow:
- Pillow:
- Me: Shhh. Don't speak.
- Pillow:
- Me: I Love You
- Pillow:
- Me: Do you love me?
- Pillow:
- Me: ....
- Pillow:
- Me: Fine bitch, I don't need you. I gots my blow up doll for this.
- Pillow: *What a loser -_-*
- (Cousin put the rest)
This really upsets me. Yes there is.
And you know that because?…
Why else would you exist?
Ever heard about parents, DNA and sex?
GOD IS REAL.
Oh that is nice. Any proof then?…
The Bible is true, the Bible says so…
The bible is just some book that some random guy wrote, ppl keep reading it like it’s a classic but i dnt see a volume two of, reason i say that is because my grandmother is actually looking for a volume two of the bible -_- kinda sad huh?
We’re not supposed to be friends, you and me. We’re meant to be enemies. Did you know that?
In sixth grade my Hebrew school put this on as a play and I was cast as Shmuel.
It was just a lot to handle as a 12 year old.
Punk Rock Rick Santorum
OH GOD
OH DEAAR JESUS
IM DYING
OH MY GOD
THE BAD RELIGION PIN THOUGH
I’M DEAD GOODBYE WORLD
Ah bruh thats not working for you…sorry to say but you look so frikin’ screwed up T ^T
God, his jokes are so friggin’ clever. Like, I get to a point where I just kinda sit there and nod my head because I’m impressed, instead of laughing. But seriously, I love them. haha
who IS THIS I’M PEEING
Demetri Martin is beast
Women don’t have to:
outofthekitchenandintothearmy:
- be thin
- have a vagina
- give birth
- cook for you
- have long hair
- wear makeup
- have sex with you
- be feminine
- be graceful
- shave
- diet
- be fashionable
- wear pink
- love men
- be the media’s idea of perfection
- listen to your bullshit
- Act Like a woman
